An apple in an orange tree

Just last week (July 6) in our technopreneurship class, we had an activity that focus or may help us find/know our own vision. At first, I was speechless, speechless because I don’t know what to say I never had a chance to have it, I attended lots of activities that may help me know myself more or test myself but I never remember it at all. As concluded? The activities which was I attended becomes useless, I didn’t blame it to our speaker but to myself. I don’t know maybe I’m a person who has life but no vision at all. How sad…

As minute passes, I think over and over again, I need to have my vision, I need to have something to share to the class. Since each one of us must have something to share. And know what word first came into my mind? M.A.T.H yes its math. I love numbers, I love computation, I love formula, I really love to see numbers as long as it has formula. It challenge me a lot.

I don’t know if what would be the role of math in my vision but I love it. I used to dream that someday I would have a work which includes numbers or I can use formula in everything I do. I don’t know, maybe I’m crazy because of this but this is what I love.

So when it’s already my turn, I stood up and share it to the class. What is my vision? “I WANT TO COMPUTE IN EVERY WAYS I TAKE” So deep but so meaningful AND THAT’S ME.

How many times I’ve told to myself even anyone who I have known that I love math but it turns to the point that prob stats which is one of our subjects this semester is not growing on me at all. Is it because I am not in myself perfectly? Or have not settled yet specifically my heartaches problems? Oww…I think that’s not the reason why. I have been giving ways my studies from my love life. I don’t want my studies to be affected. And I’ve done it many times so I don’t think it is.

As for my observation, the reason is our teacher, I don’t know but I can hardly understand what she was trying to teach us, she has a moderate voice but she speak too fast. I can’t find her (in terms of searching). I really wanted to tell her that if she can speak more slowly than what she used to but I have no voice in class, I’m too shy to speak. So I keep silent. Another is when my classmates asked her about where those answers came from, she couldn’t answer or else change the topic. And it’s very disappointing.

Along with, I would not allow myself to have low grades in math, fight for it (myself). And since I have no choice, I chose to give more time to copy the examples she has given than to settle to my drama about her teachings. Well good luck to me..(huuhuhuhuhu ) This is math, so my best to happen.